Unforgiven Scars
by redhairdream
Summary: Maka has a nightmare and soul has to help her through the depression that ensues. characters may be OOC. rated t for language


If you couldn't tell, im kind of on a soul eater kick, so bear with me lol. Anyways, I hope you enjoy.

P.S I dont own soul eater...much to my dismay...

…...

Of course Soul didn't know that I still felt guilty about letting him get hurt. That's not something a miester tells her weapon. Ninety percent of the time it was managable and easy to ignore or hide. But sometimes...sometimes it became too much. I would struggle to hide the guilt and ignore the pain chipping away at what was left of my heart. I know it's stupid to let something like this change me so much, but I couldn't help it. Tonight was one of those nights, not that I actually knew what was going to become of it till too late.

…...

I screamed, seeing the blood spray in a gruesome arc. I had this nightmare at least once every two weeks, but tonight's was even worse. Worse than it's ever been before. Maybe remnants of the kishin madness were effecting me. "Soul!"

Soul fell to his knees. "How could you let this happen? You always said you wanted to protect me! This isn't protecting!" Slowly he started to slip away and Ragnarok laughed maniacally. (luckily I didn't see Crona. I forgave him long ago.) "Maka. Maka!" I ignored the distant voice. Soul's body slumped to the ground, and I let out a heart broken scream, laced with so much pain I nearly felt my heart burst. "Maka! Wake up! C'mon."

My eyes shot open. I sucked in sharp breaths, feeling as if i'd run a marathon. And then everything caught up to me. Sobs wracked my body, and I slumped over, wanting desperatly to just give up. "I can't take this anymore."

"Maka. What the hell was that about? What were you dreaming about?!"

I ignored him. "It just gets worse and worse, the pain." I curled in on myself, wrapping my arms around my knees. "I shouldn't be feeling this much pain. It hurts. Why do I feel this way?!" I sobbed again.

…...

**Souls POV**

What was this? So much pain in her eyes. Yet she wasn't seeing anything. I don't think she was fully aware that I was there. I watched, as she curled in on herself, scared and confused on what to do. How do I comfort someone like Maka? Usually so strong and fierce, now broken by a dream. A memory maybe? I did the only thing I could think to do. I lifted up her tiny frame, slipping onto the bed where she lay and held her on my lap.

Soon her sobs subsided. But I could still feel her pain so I didn't move an inch. Suddenly, cold fingers found their way under my shirt and along the scar on my chest. "No matter what you say, It will always be my fault." So thats what this is about. I thought she had gotten over this. I don't know how many times i've told her this was my choice. I mean I was her weapon, what was I supposed to do? Let her get hurt? Right. That would not be cool at all.

"Maka. What will it take to prove to you that this is not your fault?" she got up without a word, walking out of the room as if she were a zombie. I hurriedly followed her into the kitchen.

She grabbed a large knife at random and lifted her shirt a little ways, just under her chest. "Do it. Make a matching scar. It's the only way I can think to forgive myself. Thats the only way." Her voice cracked at the end, nearly breaking my heart.

My heart stopped. What was she asking. Not cool. Not fucking cool at all. "Why the fuck would you ask this of me? How could you Maka! I'm not mad at you for this! And I sure as hell would never _never _hurt you in retailiation. How could you think so low of me! I thought you knew me better than that. Thought you knew that I wouldn't lie to you. Cool guys don't lie Maka. Especially to their weapon." Maka fell to the floor, dropping the knife.

"What am I supposed to do?"

I couldn't take this anymore. I sat and wrapped my arms around her, pulling her to me. Placing my chin on her head, I thought for a min. "What if I just prove to you over time that I don't blame you?"

She stopped crying. "How?"

"I'm not sure, but i'll figure it out. We will. We always do. How about you sleep with me in my room from now on. You always used to sleep your best with me." Maka shifted a little.

"OK." She sighed, wrapped her arms around my torso. "I hate being so weak. I'm your miester. You should never see me weak."

I laughed. That was another thing she couldn't let go. Even I knew this wasn't weakness. "Maka. First off, your not weak. You are the strongest person I know. Stronger than me even. And Blackstar, the supposed god." Thankfully this made her laugh a little. "Second, just because you have nightmares and show your emotions, and cry, doesn't mean your weak. It just means you have somethings to overcome, and all that does is show me how strong you can truly be. Someone strong enough to wield Gini-hunter without a problem, and kill the strongest kishin we have even known." I lifted her chin so she was looking at me. "And besides. Do you really think I could fall in love with a weak little girl? No. I fell I love with you. Strong, and brave, and a little nerdy Maka."

…...

**Maka POV**

My heart soared. He was in love with me. I shifted closer to him, snuggling into his chest. "Soul, I think thats the most you have ever said to me in one sitting."

He laughed loudly. "I tell you I love you and that's what you say? Not cool Maka. Not cool."

I knew he'd wait for me. Soul knows I'm not ready. Yes, I do love him, and yes I believe I know he never blamed me, but I don't think that was ever the problem. I knew i'd have to forgive myself to ever feel worthy. And I know he will help me. He will help me get over my...unknown strengths, and make myself stronger. And one day, I will forgive myself. And one day i'll return his words of love.

**So what do you think? Huh? Review plese! constructive criticisms always help:) **


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